Danny's Favorite Show
by hellomynameisv
Summary: This is apparently what happens when Danny's new favorite show is Criminal Minds, and he gets his whole family to watch it. A really long one-shot.


**A/N: So, this idea came from my APUSH class today. My teacher was teaching us how to write a proper thesis statement, and then he asked someone to give him a random prompt to answer that could be about anything at all. **

**This girl was like, "Which show is better, Criminal Minds or Blue Bloods?" And then my teacher said, as an example claim, "Although Blue Bloods is much less creepy and grim, Criminal Minds is ultimately the better show because of its attention to detail and its phenomenal character development." Apparently, he thinks that Criminal Minds is creepy because there's one serial killer after another and it keeps going on and on. And if people watch it enough, they could become serial killers themselves (not sure if he's joking or not).**

**Anyways, this got me thinking about how the Reagans would think about the show, and I just had to get it out of my head. So here it is. Enjoy!**

**Each section is a different CM episode. Dates are a bit wrong, I hope you'll let it slide.**

* * *

Making sure his kids were in bed first, Danny made his way downstairs and turned on the TV...only to be met with some kid on fire and burning to death. Well, _that _was unfortunate. And violent. But it was fake, so he was fine with it.

It was only the second episode of the entire series, and he was hooked. He liked the unique way in which they solved crimes: profiling. He only interviewed witnesses and got evidence, connecting all the dots. _They_, on the other hand, examined the case and formed a profile of the killer, figuring out the _unsub's_ motives and thoughts. _That _was impressive. He would've used profiling as a detective if he had any idea how they did it. It's not like he took psychology in college.

He continued watching, impressed by how the skinny guy somehow figured out a bunch of things from a doorknob turning three times. Seriously, a doorknob.

But, as soon as he realized the killer was some girl who was delusional and thought this was God's mission for her, he was glad that he didn't have to deal with these kinds of things in real life. His life was already crazy as it was.

* * *

Danny had told Frank about this interesting (but creepy) crime procedural he was watching. Since Frank didn't have anything to do, for once, he turned the TV on.

The episode wasn't creepy; it was slightly disturbing. And it broke his heart. That is a huge feat, considering he's been on the job long enough that it would take a lot to get him emotional.

The mother, she just died. She decided to get executed, even though she was innocent, because of her love for her son. She didn't want to completely upend his life and give him the knowledge that his dad had killed a bunch of people. _That _was love.

And as he looked at the family photos on the table, he wondered how much he would do for his children. The answer is anything he could do, though he thinks Mary would've been able to do the impossible for them.

The pain from her death, just a few months before, weighed him down as he laid down on his empty bed and fell into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

"This show makes feds seem nice," Danny muttered to himself.

He just watched one of the aforementioned feds stay with a lady terrified of moving, because if she did, she would set off the bomb in her car. And the fed wasn't even worried about his own safety. He just stayed there the entire time, comforting her and telling her that everything would be okay.

That was true bravery.

But his real life experiences with feds didn't exactly support that. They were always prying and trying to take over the investigation, not listening to any of his ideas and theories.

He wished the feds would just listen, then the case would be done faster. He also wished this BAU team existed in real life.

* * *

Danny was taking a night shift, and Erin had come over with Nicky so her, Jack, and Sean could have a sleepover. When they had (hopefully) gone to bed, Linda turned on the TV and went to the now familiar CBS channel.

Erin plopped down on the couch and, though she wouldn't admit it, got slightly scared at the ominous music. "Hey, what are you watching?" she asked.

"Criminal Minds," Linda replied, glancing at her with her piercing blue eyes. "Some show Danny's been watching a lot. Kind of got me into it too..."

"Ha, he did?"

"Yup."

They watched how people saw missing-persons fliers with their faces on it before being kidnapped. That wasn't terrifying at all.

After the episode was over, Erin stared at the screen with wide eyes for a few seconds before telling Linda, "If that ever happened to me, I'd start running and screaming for my life."

Linda just stared at her in slight disbelief.

"I'm not kidding, I would," she confirmed.

Linda just chuckled, shaking her head and getting up from the couch, leaving Erin there to think about what she just watched._ Things like that don't actually happen in real life, do they? _she thought.

* * *

Danny was, yet again, watching Criminal Minds. The couch was now occupied by him most Wednesday nights from 9:00 to 10:00. This episode was about some serial killer who fell, got a concussion, and went into a four-year coma. _Well, that's a good punishment for what he did_, he thought.

He soon changed his mind when they found out the guy had amnesia and, therefore, could be proven innocent. His mind changed from 'you deserve that' to 'you're just lucky'.

After that, he didn't really pay attention to the episode anymore. Not even when they found the guy cradling a dead, decomposed body that was now really a skeleton, one of his previous victims. It was honestly kind of creepy and Erin would've probably thrown up at that scene.

But he didn't focus on any of that, not when someone who looked suspiciously like Linda showed up onscreen. They had the same voice, too! It was _so _weird. Either Linda had a secret life of acting that she was hiding from him, or she actually had a doppelganger. He had thought doppelgangers were just a myth and didn't actually exist. Until now.

As soon as he heard the door open and Linda come in, he asked, "Linda, baby? Why did I see you on TV today?"

* * *

Joe died. He _died. _Died! Joe, just...died.

Danny couldn't exactly come to terms with it. Nor could the rest of his family (especially Jamie). Poor Jamie, who had always looked up to Joe, who was in the academy to become a police officer. He could tell that his dad was also taking it pretty bad, but was hiding it for their sakes.

They had all spent a whole three days at Pop's house, consoling each other and trying their hardest not to cry every waking minute. Eventually, they knew they had to go home...so they did. Jack and Sean had been gloomy and silent the entire ride home, eyes red-rimmed from tearing up every time they were reminded that their Uncle Joe was never coming back.

Trying to comfort everyone else had distracted Danny from his grief, but now he had nothing to take his mind off of Joe. So he turned on the TV.

And was met with a brand new episode of Criminal Minds called 'Brothers in Arms'. It was about a serial killer targeting cops. _That _did not help Danny at all. Not only did it remind him about Joe's death (he had been a detective, but close enough), it also reminded him about Jamie becoming a cop soon, right after he graduates from the academy.

Danny couldn't help but think that Jamie was going to meet an untimely death like Joe had, couldn't shake off the terror and concern.

So he called Jamie. It was pretty late, he knew, but he just had to. He was met with Jamie's tired, _"Hello?"_

"Hey, Jamie," he greeted, "Um...how are you feeling?"

Jamie must've heard the slight waver in his voice and called him out on it. _"How are _you_?"_

Danny sighed, annoyed at the kid's perception. "Don't answer my question with another question."

_"Just, don't...don't shut down your emotions because you're trying to be strong for the rest of us. I can see it, you know? How you're holding back. Dad's already doing it, please don't do it too. It's not healthy. I can take it."_

And that's how Danny found himself finally breaking down and crying, confessing his fears to Jamie. They stayed on the phone until Jamie's unfortunately ran out of battery.

* * *

Henry doesn't think he'll ever go to sleep again.

Not that the episode had been scary...disgusting would be more accurate. The guy actually took the _eyes _of his victims as souvenirs! He should've figured that out from the title, but still! He had reason to be queasy, right?

Back in the day, all he had to deal with were robberies, muggings, and people killing people in _normal _ways. Like, shooting them, stabbing them to death. They hadn't done anything _that_ gruesome to the victim.

And now this.

He wondered if that was what Danny and Jamie dealt with in their everyday lives.

The newer generations were going to be the deaths of everyone.

* * *

"Damn, they actually have a plane?" Jackie asked, surprised.

"Yeah," Danny replies nonchalantly.

They were eating lunch, and he had just told Jackie about this show he was now watching monthly (not weekly; his job prevents that).

"Is the FBI this rich? That why feds are so frustrating to work with?"

"Dunno." Danny shrugged. "By the way, did you see the one titled 'Parasite'? That one's pretty good."

* * *

There are these three episodes, 'Coda', 'Valhalla', and 'Lauren', that make Danny extremely grateful he wasn't born into a CIA-dominant family. The CIA sounded way too complicated for him. Like, undercover work? Working with terrorists?

Sure, he's had some action with terrorists (ahem, 9/11), but nothing that personal that they would go after him and kill the people he worked with.

He's glad his blood runs NYPD blue, instead of whatever color blood the CIA is (probably black...or red).

* * *

Sometimes, Criminal Minds knew just what he needed.

Linda had just been rescued after being abducted...all because of his imminent testifying. The amount of guilt he felt for that was undefinable. She kept reassuring him that she wasn't hurt, but that didn't do much to ease the guilt.

He turned on the TV because he needed something to do instead of sitting around, waiting for Linda to come home from her shift and hoping she came back unharmed.

It was the first episode of the new season, so he was happy, but still worried.

He soon found out that one of the characters they all thought was dead was actually alive. It gave him a little hope, just a little, that if you got hurt, you could always bounce back.

The episode was also about catching a terrorist and a bunch of diplomatic stuff. That certainly got most of his mind off of Linda. They finally got the guy who had been alluding them for the past few months! Maybe he really could save Linda whenever she got hurt!

When she finally came home, she found him asleep on the couch, an expression of slight content on his face.

* * *

'Profiling 101' was probably Jamie's favorite episode out of all the episodes.

They didn't follow the usual formula of the episodes, which got boring over time. It was also an interesting enough case to keep him watching, because usually he'd fall asleep halfway through (half from fatigue).

They also kind of taught you how they caught the killer. They taught you how to profile, and that was something Jamie was _very _interested in learning.

Not that he actually understood how they got to the identity of the killer. Some of it made sense to him, but even his Harvard brain couldn't fully comprehend the art of profiling.

He figured he should stick to policing.

* * *

A lot of things remind Linda of a Criminal Minds episode.

Perhaps it's because she's married to a detective who's part of a whole family in law enforcement. Maybe it's because she's a nurse at a hospital and sees terrible injuries every day. It might be because she's a mom and her worry for her children is unparalleled.

Whatever the reason, this episode was no different. She was stitching up a patient's cut. It wasn't like a serial killer was after the young lady; she had just accidentally cut her hand when cooking. An unfortunate everyday mishap.

But, unfortunately, she had just watched an episode the night before where the serial killer stitched his victims' mouths closed. _That _wasn't disturbing at all.

And now she was doing just that. Well...not the mouth, but it _was_ stitching. She felt just a _tiny _bit uncomfortable with that, which was bad, since it was her job to stitch things shut.

Maybe she shouldn't have watched that episode.

* * *

Nicky was kind of scared now.

She had heard of the show from her friends and her uncles and mom had mentioned it once or twice, so she decided to try and watch an episode. She was 16, after all. She figured she could take some fake crime procedural, especially considering what her family did for a living.

She regretted that now.

Well, not completely. She only half-regretted it. It had had interesting characters, and the plot was unique.

The plot was also the problem, though. She saw a bunch of students get kidnapped on a school bus and forced to play some sick game...and now she was taking the bus to school. She knew it was irrational, but she couldn't shake the fear of getting kidnapped the entire ride there.

And when they finally got to school and she stepped on the ground, she felt an extreme sense of relief rush through her.

Maybe she should stick to watching something else instead...or maybe not.

* * *

"And you are introducing me to a crime procedural because..." Baez asked, slightly confused as to why Danny liked this show so much when their lives were pretty much a crime procedural. It could've been recorded and put on CBS, for all she knew. But Danny still insisted that she watch it and was offended when he found out that she had never heard of the show before.

"Because it's good," Danny replied.

"Okay..."

And of course he recommended her the episode where there were skeletons buried in a man's backyard. Not creepy at all.

It didn't give her a good impression on the show since it made it look more like a horror movie...but she'd watch it anyways. Maybe it'd teach her something. And it'd get her closer to her new partner. She didn't know him all that much (she had heard that he had a temper and was demanding), so it could be something they'd...bond over?

Ack, now she sounded like a sap.

* * *

Sometimes, Criminal Minds knew exactly what he didn't want.

They were spending the night in the hospital after Linda was shot (hurt again because of him...not directly related, but the guilt still bogged him down). It was again a Wednesday night, so he turned on the crappy TV there.

It was like a tradition now. If he and Linda were both home, they'd watch it together. Not the happiest thing to watch, but it was something.

And of course, when he turned it on, he saw one of the feds get shot. Linda was just shot. His mind made that connection and he just couldn't ignore it. He moved to turn off the TV before it drove him insane, but Linda's soft hand stopped him.

So they watched. Watched the whole two episodes because it was a season finale.

Luckily, the fed survived. Extremely luckily, since he had been shot in the neck. Like, the neck? He asked Linda if it was even possible to survive something like that, and she just shrugged and muttered, "Sure."

Well, if it was possible, he hoped his entire family would have that amount of luck whenever they got hurt.

* * *

Henry, yet again, contemplated the sanity of the younger generations.

Seriously, a monster with claws? That...he didn't even know what to think. The show gave a pretty reasonable sounding explanation to the hallucinations, but a monster with claws?

This sounded more like a horror movie than a crime procedural, though Henry's already thought that multiple times, so it shouldn't shock him that much anymore.

What happened to just killing the person with your own bare hands? Not that he'd want anyone to die; he wouldn't wish death on anyone.

But...a monster with claws?

* * *

"This show makes cops look stupid," Eddie complained in response to the Criminal Minds episode they had watched the night before (at Jamie's apartment; shh).

"What do you mean?" Jamie asked, glancing at her for a split second before looking at the road again.

"The FBI agents just swoop in and save the day! The cops have to _ask _them for help."

"Well...the show _does _focus on them."

"But we're not that dumb! Remember all the crimes we've solved, all the things we've done? And we're just beat cops, not even detectives."

Jamie nodded in agreement. "But that episode last night, 'Tribute', didn't make cops look _that _stupid."

"But a bunch do! I think they should actually research and see how cops are _really _like."

"You planning to complain to the studio?"

"Possibly."

* * *

He couldn't believe it. Linda had _died_. From a helicopter accident, of all things. All those years when he thought his job would be the death of her, it turned out to actually be her job.

How ironic.

But it was Wednesday night, at 10:00, and all he could think about were the many times he and Linda had curled up on the couch together, watching gruesome murders unfold on the screen. It had become almost like a tradition.

So he turned it on, just as he had hundreds of times already.

Turns out, the feds somehow got into a car crash. Not a helicopter crash, but it still made his heart throb.

And one of them died. Had a funeral and all, they got to see his dead body. His widow cried for him.

And he cried with her. Cried for the soft spoken woman he had come to know over the years. The one with blue eyes and soft, blond hair that went just above her shoulders. The one who was the mother to his children. The one who got him out of dark places and who reminded him of the goodness of the world. The one who knew just what to say. The one who might have known him better than he did himself.

Linda.

_Here's to you_, he thought.

* * *

Clowns had always been around the middle of Jack's list of fears.

Watching that episode of Criminal Minds didn't exactly help. Now, if anything, that fear was on the top of his list. Of course the first time he decided to watch the show was when an episode about clowns was airing. Of course.

A clown terrorizing a town and killing the people there wasn't creepy or weird at all.

So when his uncle Jamie somehow got tickets to a circus (something about helping an old lady with her groceries), and asked if he and Sean wanted to come, he immediately said no and claimed that he had too much schoolwork to do.

It wasn't a complete lie.

But his fear of clowns was certainly part of the reason.

* * *

They had just finished watching a new episode, this time at Eddie's apartment (shh).

Eddie sighed in relief, causing Jamie to glance at her. "What? Are you glad it's over?" he asked.

"No, it's just that, based on the title, I thought it'd be about cannibalism or something. Thank goodness it wasn't!"

"Well, it wasn't about that, but it still had people being poisoned...that's not _that _great."

"It wasn't about people eating other people, though!"

Jamie silently admitted that he probably would've thrown up if that had been the case. Meanwhile, Eddie was thinking about how their lives were so much more interesting than those in the show.

"You know what, they should have a TV show about us," she exclaimed abruptly. It seemed to come out of nowhere to Jamie.

"_Us?_"

"Yeah! It'd be more realistic, too! It'd showcase our crime fighting skills, _amazing _jokes, _and _everyone making fun of you all the time. I can just see it!"

Jamie just shook his head in amusement and began to clean up the takeout they had been eating, throwing it into the trash. "Sure, Eddie, sure. America would be _so _interested in our lives."

"And we could have your whole family in it too, you know? Instead of a crime family, a crime _fighting _family. How about that? Danny's anger management classes and his cases, Erin's badass lawyer skills, and the Commissioner's...stuff, all in one place! It'd be called...'The Reagans'! You like that?"

"No. That makes us sound like a reality TV show like 'The Kardashians'."

"Oof...I'll think of something."

* * *

"Why's everyone gathered here on a Wednesday night?" Frank asked, walking into the living room to find his three children, their children, and his dad all sitting in various places in the room.

"Watching CM," Nicky answered.

"And CM is?" he asked.

"Oh, come on, Dad," Danny said, "it's Criminal Minds! I'm offended you didn't know what it was."

Frank sighed and sat at the recliner, which had been free. He glanced at the TV just in time to see a scared little girl with a man, presumably the serial killer (or the unsub, as he had learned to call them).

"Don't you kids have homework?" he suddenly asked.

"I finished it all," Sean declared.

"And Dad let us stay up for tonight to watch this, but after that, it's up to bed," Jack added.

Frank glanced at Danny, who just shrugged and continued to watch the scene play out. He decided to let it be, hoping this episode wasn't one that contained gruesome crime scenes or a huge gunfight at the end.

Well...there hadn't been a huge gunfight at the end. They had convinced the guy, whose _real_ daughter had died, to let the girl (the one he had _thought _was his daughter) and woman go peacefully, which was good.

What was not so good was that everyone was pretty much crying by the end.

* * *

Something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue. It was a tradition for brides. Unfortunately, Eddie couldn't think of anything blue to wear. She had a new (white) wedding dress, and she had borrowed old earrings from her mother (technically both old and borrowed). Now she needed a blue thing.

She took so long thinking that she got bored and decided to turn on the TV. Criminal Minds was on, and she soon learned that someone was going to get married during the episode. _It's a sign! _she jokingly thought.

When Jamie came back from his extra sergeant duties, she asked him about the 'something blue' that she was still missing.

"You already have something blue," Jamie told her.

"What do you mean?"

"We're cops! Our blood runs blue!"

"Huh," she muttered, "I never thought about that."

"Yeah, plus! _I _come from a family of cops. You'll have a lot of blue at the wedding."

So that's how she found her 'something blue'.


End file.
